Dylan J. Kershaw is a comedian and creative producer from the south of England. Dylan is also the host and producer of "I Hate Poetry", a poetry-comedy podcast.
It’s rectangle but it feels soft,it must be another t-shirt, fuck!It’s a perfectly square box,oh please not Lynx Africa you schmuck! It’s a triangle, what could it be?I feel like this could be different, I feel such luck!Triangular socks, why didn’t...
Bellowing was talking about the fact he was made redundant again,it’s hurting poor Murmuring’s brain.Wailing found out her boyfriend was also seeing another,for Pattering, having three others was no bother.Singing was clueless but nice and...
Baby lotion or handwash?
Trick or treat!
Frog or toad?
Trick or treat!
Macarons or Maceroons?
Trick or treat!
Sphinx or a Sphynx?
Trick or treat… fuck it, you can have both.
Featured in Episode 11 – Diving into bone – Halloween special!
A handshake now feels wrong, just like a baker’s son, eating at Greggs. People hugging each other… you might as well peg. You’re so close to me, it’s making me anxious. Sprewing your germs over me, like a blank canvas. Is this who I am now? Some...
S – Smothering. They are not a queen for you to serve. I – Intent to win. You cannot win every bet. You cannot force her to fold. M – Melodramatic. Don’t be fooled by thinking you can win the grand prize. P – Persistent. Don’t keep betting when...
Screw you daffodil,You always take the glory,Looking all yellow and acting quite perv-y. The way you man-spread yourself over anyone’s yard,Yet do you ever think of me? There is such disregard. When we were planted, you were a thoughtful...
The warmth of the light,And the cigarettes comfort me. While slags talk about their ex-boyfriends,It smothers me. Give me some air, as there is so much aroundI’m surrounded in this cage, my friends have let me down… So here I stand, talking to...
You started by talking to the manager, making your family members frown. Now you’re hoarding toilet rolls on a shopping spree in lockdown. With your “Karen” haircut and attitude, people ridicule you on social media. Lots of sons, daughters and...